I know it’s sounds like a cliche to say that my mum is my best friend, like I am saying it because isn’t that what a lot of people say when talking about their mum? Well, some do, but it’s exactly how I feel about my mum…
I kept my mum waiting for me before I even arrived and I like to think I was worth the wait. The daughter that she longed for and waited to hold in her arms. Finally arriving to make her a mummy to two, giving my brother a little sister.
When I look back to my childhood, my mum is always in the pictures in my mind, every memory my mum has a part in it. In our early years, she stayed at home to look after us. My parents worked hard to make sure we never went without, we had a family holiday every year, the bikes that we wanted for our birthday, new clothes and shoes and we got our mummy home with us every day.
There was nothing my mum wouldn’t do for us…
When I started school I was really scared, did my mum just leave me with the teacher? No, she offered her skills to the school, so that she could be there for me. She taught the children how to sew, many of my friends still remember my mum teaching them to sew. Yes, she wasn’t there by my side, but that wouldn’t really have helped me to settle in. But knowing that my mum was at the school and sometimes catching a glance of her was enough for me to feel secure.
When I was young I didn’t seem to need a lot of sleep. I would often wake up about 9.30pm and I would sit at the top of the stairs waiting for the kitchen light to go on. Because every night before the news my mum would go and make a cup of coffee and I would sneak down to see her.
Was she cross? Did she march me back up the stairs to bed? No, she let me go and snuggle up with her while she had her coffee and then tucked me up in bed. I think she secretly loved the snuggles…
She was the mum that did baking with us, the mum that made salt dough for us to decorate, the mum that never said ‘no’ to us doing painting. In the summer we would go blackberry picking, picnics and trips out.
My mum can’t swim and doesn’t like water, she was determined we would not be like her. She would take us swimming herself, take us for swimming lessons and always made sure when we went on holiday there was a pool. My brother and I both love the water and can confidently swim, this is all because of my mum.
As we have got older, yes the role of my mum in my life has changed, but what hasn’t changed and never will is of course the love she has for me and my brother. But, it’s more than that, I know that she worries about us constantly, especially when there are big things going on in our lives. She still has sleepless nights over us…Yes, I am sorry parents who are reading this the sleepless nights are here to stay, just for different reasons!
I know that she would do anything for us and she still puts us first in her life.
When I became a mummy for the first time, I remember so many times thinking ‘oh, that’s why my mum did that’. I totally got it.
When I look at how I am with my girls, the things that I love to do with them…it’s like looking back to my childhood, I am mirroring the way my mum was with me, maybe with my own little twist on things, but I learnt from the best.
Now, I get to see my mum as nan to my girls and it is the most special relationship. My girls totally adore their nan, they see their house as their second home, they talk about her constantly and want to see her all the time.
Some of my favourite pictures are of my mum holding my girls for the first time, the love is there for everyone to see.
My mum has taken to the role of nan perfectly, she is there for me when I need her, but she never oversteps the mark handing out advice that I don’t need to hear. She guides me when I need her to and sometimes she just agrees that its tough sometimes, which is all I need to hear.
In a weird way my girls have jumped the queue, they are now the most important people in my mum’s life, along with my niece. There is nothing my mum wouldn’t do for her granddaughters.
My brother and I are no longer at the top of pedestal, we have slipped down to second place, but that’s where I want to be. I want her granddaughters to have that place, because there is no greater feeling than to know someone loves your children as much as you do.
I don’t very often get the chance to tell my mum what she means to me, in fact I probably never tell my mum what she means to me, because life gets in the way. But, really there are no words, every time I go to write what she means to me, the words don’t seem enough…
I am lucky that my mum is my best friend and I hope that one day when my girls are older I have the same relationship with them that I have with my mum.