I will be honest and say that this has worried me a lot. I know that my little Alice will happily skip into school every single day, that is the little girl that she is and so far that is exactly what has happened. I know that it won’t be long before she comes home with stories to tell me about the friends that she has played with that day.
We choose a school that was perfect for Alice, but also a school that she would not know anyone in her school year. But that didn’t worry us, she takes after her daddy and is a lovely confident, chatty little girl.
Whereas I am the opposite, I am not confident in these situations, I worry about fitting in and having to make conversations with new people. It has kept me awake at night since we found out which school Alice was going to, it felt so final then and I knew I could no longer pretend it wasn’t happening.
I worry that my social awkwardness will affect Alice, I worry that everyone will already know each other from the preschool the children went to. That they won’t be interested in talking to me.
At preschool I never felt this pressure, parents would just drop off and go. There was this sense that the children wouldn’t be going there for long and the need to fit in wasn’t there. But with school its not just Alice that joins, its the whole family. We will be going to this school for many years and Holly will hopefully be following in her footsteps.
How do you break the ice? How to take those steps from a smile or a ‘good morning’? These are questions I ask myself all the time. I was exactly the same at baby groups, and in the end I would just not go to them. I had a choice then, I don’t now.
It would seem I am not alone, I have spoken to a few mum’s whose children have not started school yet and they feel the same. They have the same worries about making friends and fitting in. But, I have also chatted to some mum’s who are not bothered if they don’t speak to anyone, that its not important to them to make friends at the school gate.
It would appear that everyone approaches the school mum life differently. I am definitely the type of person that wants to meet other mums, to be able to chat at the school gate and go to the park at the end of school day.
For the two weeks that I’ve been going I have gone with a smile on my face, saying hello to anyone that catches my eye and making an effort to appear friendly. I have left my ‘don’t talk to me face’, at home!
I know it won’t happen overnight, that everyone won’t instantly be chatty and that these things take time. But what I do hope is that when I get to the end of the school year, I can share with you that I was worrying over nothing. That I’ve managed to nail being a school mum and that I’ve met some lovely people that I chat to at the school gate and maybe even call them a friend…
Are you a school mum? Did you have these worries when your child started school? Or, is it not something that you even think about?
I would love to hear your stories of becoming a school mum and if you have any advice for a newbie!